The Post Where I Get To Share News Bigger Than A Gilmore Girls Reunion

I haven't updated this blog in a while, but not because there was nothing to say. In fact, there was SO MUCH to say, but I couldn't say any of it!! So I'll bring you up to speed.

Back in late November, my amazing rock star of an agent, Leigh Feldman, sent my book out on submission to editors. Back then it was called REBEL WITHOUT A CLUE, and it was met with a lot of interest. Publishing moves at somewhat of a glacial pace, so I basically bit my fingernails to nubs and drank a lot of coffee (and sometimes things slightly stronger) as we waited to hear back. We'd gotten an offer of interest from one publisher, and although they would have been an absolute dream to work with, the offer wasn't quite what we were hoping for as a debut. Several other publishers had it too, but we still hadn't heard further.

And then, in mid-February, right when I'd decided to throw myself a pity party of one and climb back into bed and stream Gilmore Girls all day on Netflix because I was sure nothing was going to happen, my cell phone rang. It was Leigh, and said that Annette Pollert-Morgan, an Editor at Sourcebooks Fire, loved my book and wanted to set up a conversation with me that morning.

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

An hour or so later, I was on the phone with Annette, who just completely "got" this book, and told me she wanted to make an "I Heart Hank" t-shirt. She told me all her favorite lines and scenes, and the ways she wanted to help me make this an even stronger book where the scenes and characters would just pop off the page. It was surreal to hear someone talk about my book this way who seemed to understand every nuance and detail of it as well as I did.

After we hung up, I took a picture of my caller ID, mostly because I'm a noob but also becase I wanted to remember that moment in time forever. The moment my lifetime dream to be a published author came true as an amazing editor offered to buy my book. I made it the background screen on my phone!

Over the next couple of days, the details of the offer were ironed out, and Annette sent me a beautiful note along with a box of books she had previously edited with personalized post-it notes on each one, saying why she thought I'd like each in particular. (Oh, did I mention we share a mutual love of office supplies??!!)

But then....silence. This is, of course, the norm, as I've come to find out. In this time period the publisher goes back and forth with the agent to sort out the contract, the Editor is typing up her edit notes, and the author is making her way through a Costco jar of milk chocolate covered almonds. I wasn't allowed to say anything until the publisher gave me the thumbs up, because they wanted to announce in Publishers Weekly, and it couldn't have been announced elsewhere in order to do so. However, in the interim, some concerns grew over my title. While REBEL WITHOUT A CLUE was fun and certainly captured the humor of the book, the publisher worried that teens might not get the reference to REBEL WITHOUT A CAUSE. Annette and I put our heads together over the next month until we came up with the truly perfect title: MY KIND OF CRAZY. And then, with all green lights in place, this happened!!!

So now I'm back in the revision cave, armed with Annette's amazing edit notes, and having a blast. Once I send this draft back to her, she will send me her line edits, and once she signs off of my draft of those, MY KIND OF CRAZY is well on its way to becoming a real book. Sometime in the Fall, there will be Advance Reading Copies (or ARC's as they are called) that will be sent to reviewers, bloggers, etc. and most of all, I will get to hold my actual book in my hand, albeit not the final version. That comes in April, 2016, just in time for my birthday, which is pretty much the best present ever, am I right??

This morning I discovered the book is already up on Goodreads, so I hope you'll check it out and consider adding it to your reading list!

Six years, three books, two agents, and hundreds of rejections later, it finally happened. There are SO many times I wanted to give up, but at the end of the day, that's not who I am. This is what I love to do, and this book is truly the book of my heart. The delay is never the denial. And it takes a village to make it happen, for sure. So many incredible people I've met along the way that are part of helping make this happen. I'm pretty excited to share it with the world! (And also, not gonna lie, also slightly terrified!!)

Why Do Agents Take So Long To Answer My Query and Other Burning Questions You Always Wanted Answered: A Behind-The Scenes Q&A With Lit Agent Brent Taylor From TriadaUS

The road to publication is long and twisty and not for the faint-of heart, but along the way you may meet some incredibly cool people who help make the journey all the more fun and exciting. One of those people for me is Brent Taylor, who is an amazing, enthusiastic, up-and-coming literary agent with TriadaUS Literary Agency, Inc. (Follow him on Twitter @NaughtyBrent)! Although he is not my agent, from the moment we became friends, we have each been cheerleading each others' successes along the way. Brent has provided me with incredibly helpful insight into all the ins and outs of publishing, and I told him that when I was first starting out querying, I wish that I had been able to find more information that helped de-mystify the whole process and answers to all the noob questions about the things most authors are dying to know. Being the awesome person that he is, he graciously agreed! So without further delay, Brent Taylor gives you all the answers you've been waiting for.

Hi Brent! Thanks so much for visiting my blog and offering to help shed a little light on the mysteries of the agenting world! Top of the list, of course, is once a writer sends off that query, why does it take so long to hear back? (I know TriadaUS is pretty fast, but speaking generally for most agencies) Aren’t you all sitting by your computers hitting inbox refresh, just waiting for that hot new idea?
You’re right—it generally doesn’t take that long at all for a writer who has queried me to hear back. The longest I let a query sit is two days, but I typically respond within 24 hours. A response time that quick is understandably rare, and it will change once I have a heavier list. Contrary to popular belief, it isn’t necessarily all about that “hot new idea” that will make editors line up outside the door with cash. I get a lot of queries that I’m on the fence about, so although I do take a peek once a new email comes in, I almost always file it away for later.

Describe a typical day in the life. What sorts of fires do you have to put out on a daily basis?
I wake up around 6:30 a.m. and drink coffee as I do damage-control on my email. I like to clear everything pressing off my desk before I start going through queries. After that and through lunch time, I’m usually editing client manuscripts, on the phone with editors or my boss, or doing miscellaneous emailing. The wonderful thing about agenting is that there is no “typical day,” however, so sometimes this routine is shaken up by a book deal or the signing of a new client.

Do you read manuscripts at home in the evenings and on weekends?
This is the only time to read manuscripts. There are just too many phone calls, emails, and distractions during the day.

How many queries do you get a week? On average how many of those turn into full or partial requests, and ultimately into offers?
I get roughly 20-25 a day, so a minimum of 140 queries per week usually. I’m awful at math, so I can’t even begin to comprehend what it would take to calculate a conversion rate, but I will tell you the following two things:
I do tend to over-request. My philosophy is when in doubt request the manuscript and take a closer look, because I don’t want to miss on the opportunity to work on something that could be great with one extra push. I started taking unsolicited submissions in September 2014, and I have 4 clients as of February 2015. My first client was a writer I’d worked closely in a handful of other capacities, the next two were from the slushpile, and the last was a referral from a colleague. So of the thousands of unsolicited queries I’ve read in the last months, two turned into offers of representation.

What is the number one thing with a bullet that makes you fall in love with a story?
Writing that resonates. It’s a very magical feeling when a novel invigorates you and you’re able to reflect or grapple with a personal issue in a new light because of that novel.

So many authors complain that an agent passed because they loved their writing but didn’t connect to the story. In those circumstances, would you ever consider signing that client anyway because of the potential you see? If not, why not?
Here’s the thing: it’s hard enough for us to sell the books that we love. So offering representation to a writer we can’t get fully behind isn’t only a drag for us, but it’s a huge disservice to the writer. You really deserve nothing less than an agent that will fight to the death for your writing career, and I would have such a bad conscience if I represented someone whose writing I couldn’t get passionate about. I’ve passed on a ton of books that other agents represent and I know will sell—because they just weren’t books I gravitated toward as a reader. That’s something I remind myself a lot when making important decisions: I’m an average reader first, and a literary agent second.

Once you get a query that interests you and you request to see more, what happens next? What is involved before you would actually offer representation?
I read the manuscript, and if about 50% of the way through I’m really loving it, I ask for a second opinion on the pitch and first few pages from a friend or colleague. Once I’ve finished reading and still feel confident about offering representation, I make an exciting phone call.

Once you have signed a client, how often should they expect to be in touch with you? What sort of role should an author expect of their agent in getting a manuscript ready to go on submission?
This is so tough, because not only is every agent different, but every client and novel is different too. Like in every business, you have clients and projects that need more attention than others. For me, it’s less about giving each client X amount of my time, but instead striving to constantly assess and meet their needs with 110% effort.

What are the key things a writer should and should not do when reaching out to agents to ensure they do not induce involuntary eye rolls and make them feel stabby?
I’m so grateful for anyone reaching out and sharing their novels with me, so I try to keep eye-rolling to a minimum. But just a few things that come to mind…Be polite and don’t assume too much. Phrases like “I know you’ll love this” and “you said this is what you’re looking for, so you’ll love this” don’t work in your favor. A concise query is a good query. If it can’t fit onto one page, it needs some strong reconsideration.

What made you interested in being an agent?
I’m a natural leader and I have been since I was a kid, so taking charge and being an authority is what I’m good at. Being an agent in this day and age requires this amazing balance between business-savviness and having your finger editorially and artistically on the pulse. That’s precisely why agenting is the only job for me.

What types of manuscripts make you jump the couch that you’d love to see but aren’t seeing right now? What’s the best way to get in touch with you?
No one’s sending me this generation’s Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, perhaps because I’m a man, but I’m trying to put the word out there that this is something I desperately want. Beyond Sisterhood, I’m very open to all sorts of YA. For some reason, I’m also having a hard time getting diverse submissions to come through my inbox. All flavors of diversity are welcome, but LGBT characters and storylines are of a great personal importance to me. I would go crazy for a literary MG or a novel written in verse. The best way to reach me is at brent@triadaus.com. Querying writers can send me their query letter and first ten pages pasted into the body of the message.

Thanks so much for all this great insight, Brent! Good luck everyone!

Self-Imposed Roadblocks And Other Hazards of The Writer Life

I had a deep realization yesterday, and I realized that I am probably not alone in feeling this way, so I decided to be open and blog about it. I am struggling with writing my next book, but not because of a shortage of ideas, or because the words won't come (though they are coming slower than I'd like), or because life is pulling me in too many other directions. I'm struggling because I'm scared. Of what exactly? Glad you asked.

Yesterday, I spent the day at my friend's beach house at a writing retreat. There were six of us, all in various stages of our publishing careers from trying to break in to a NYT Bestselling YA author. We all sat in our respective seats, armed with our coffee and tea, and spent our days in (semi) silence, working. It was inspiring to be an a room so infused with creative energy, and I wrote two new pages of content, but still I could not let myself completely embrace this new story. I allowed myself to begin another idea, just to see what came out, and immediately 175 words tumbled out that felt funny and fresh and I felt more natural writing it, so I started to wonder if maybe THIS is what I should have spent more of my day working on. And then I talked to my friend about the dark, twisty third project that is so unlike the book I have on submission that keeps drawing me to it to write but it's scary to me because it makes me have to reach into some pretty dark places. She said "Write what scares you."

The truth is, ALL of them scare me, and in different ways. I wrote the book of my heart, and it flowed out of me effortlessly, and it landed me my dream agent, and now it's on submission. Frankly, it feels a little like wondering if lightning can really strike twice. Hoping that I can write another story that feels as solid and twisty-turny, with rich characters and humor. As I've started several different stories, all of which I believe do hold that potential and could be fun to work on, I am my own worst enemy. I am constantly comparing it to the work I have already finished but still, on some level, feel connected to because it's out there on submission and if it sells, I may need to return to it and those characters at any time. And they are like family. A new story is like meeting friends for the first time, having to go through getting to know them and figuring out who they are and what their deal is, and while that's also very exciting, it is also daunting. But as we all know, comparison is the thief of joy.

The fear that I'll never write anything this good again is unfounded, if not ridiculous, of course. History has shown me that with every book I write, my writing has only gotten stronger: the stories are more intricately plotted, the dialogue is more natural and the characters are more vivid. Plus, this is my true passion. I can't think of many things I am this passionate about, except maybe coffee and great chocolate, but I digress. I have been writing since I was three years old, and no matter how many times I have been frustrated by the process, I always return to it because it is as much an essential part of me as the oxygen in my lungs. So where does this self-doubt come from? Fear. Pure, raw, unadulterated fear. While the possibility remains that I can't write something wondeful ever again, the truth is the evidence is stacked in favor of the fact that I can. So I have discovered that more than meditating on which story to write, I need to work on breaking down the fear. It's like a giant, self-imposed road block that is standing in my way of reaching my goals, and I am the only one who can tear it down. It helps when you are battling your enemy to know who your enemy is, and I have discovered that most of the time, it is me.

For me, this discovery feels very freeing. So today, I am starting my Sunday morning with my mug (okay, pot) of coffee and a silent meditation, letting go, best I can of the fear and allowing in the positive energy of believing in myself and my dreams, which at the core of me, I truly do, or I wouldn't keep on keeping on with this. At the end of the day, we are solely responsible for the thoughts our mind produces, and the key is to learn to take control over them and create moments of peace for ourselves. So I raise my coffee mug to any of you who are feeling the same way, and please excuse me while I attempt to go ninja on that bastard fear and show it who's boss and write the hell out of what scares me.

Why I Write Young Adult Novels

I've been thinking a lot lately about why it is that I write young adult novels. After all, those teen years of my life from middle school through high school honestly were some of the worst, most painful and agonizing times for which you could not pay me enough to relive. Between the jealousies, the girl dramas, the emotional rollercoasters, the painful breakups, agonizing over body image, popularity, the brand of my jeans, and bad hair days, it's a wonder I survived. So why would I ever want to go back there and immerse myself back into a world where every single event that happens, big and small, feels like the end of the world?

I suppose I write for teenage me, because in my stories I always favor the underdog, the stereotypes can be broken, the prettiest girl doesn't always get the hottest guy, and the longshot can pay off. I rewrite history - maybe my history. Maybe I simply give some other teenager out there hope that they can rewrite theirs too. Because when you are a teenager navigating those years, so much energy is wasted on all the wrong things and the wrong people. We judge ourselves by how we are viewed through the lenses of our peers, many of whom we do not even like or respect to begin with. We try to blend in lest we earn ourselves an unsavory label: geek, freak, loser, whatever. It's not until we become older that we realize that letting our freak flag fly is what makes us so individual, so cool, and that all those people that flew under the radar in high school are actually the ones with the genuine hearts and the real stories. I write for them too.

My stories are filled with humor and heartbreak and unlikely friendships where limits are tested, often by the social infrastructures of high school or family life. My characters are resilient and dig deep to discover their own self worth, even if they may not know initially it exists at all. Perfect is boring and bad decisions and scars are what make the stories compelling and stomach churning.

The first book I wrote, BAND GEEK, did not sell. A common thread of feedback was that a boy main character was a tough sell, because although a girl would be interested in getting inside a guy's head and seeing how he thinks, they wouldn't be interested in THIS guy's head. Why? Because he was an awkward band geek. I felt like that was selling a potential audience short, as well as perpetuating the idea that the only interesting characters to read about are ones who are handsome and super jocks or bad boys from the wrong side of the tracks. Nice guys fumbling their way through high school hoping to catch a break? Not so much. I ESPECIALLY write for THAT kid. For all those kids in the marching band with my son that year I wrote BAND GEEK who didn't have a place in young adult literature except as a negative geeky stereotype, but they were the kids who devoured books and loved to read. And they wanted to read about one of their own, someone like them who made it through okay and maybe even got the girl of his dreams or got noticed for all the right reasons. Maybe that story would instill a little hope. Because it's awfully hard to find hope sometimes when you are a teenager.

I write young adult novels because I want to help instill that hope. I go back into that world willingly in the hopes that the characters I create may help some reader find the humor and know that they are not alone. That anything (and anyone) can change for the better. And I will never stop writing the kinds of stories where the underdog wins, because those are the stories that fill my heart and make all the battle scars worth it.

Procrastibaking and Other Hazards Of The Limbo Writing Zone

So you've finished your last book and it is sitting in the inboxes of half of Manhattan and you are anxiously awaiting news of any sort because you're in this funky sort of limbo state. If the book sells, the editor will want you to revise and you will need to go back in the heads of your previous characters, so you can't possibly dive into something new because that would be practically schizophrenic switching gears like that, right?

Put down the chocolate and log off of Facebook and stop your procrastibaking, my friends. This is what is known as an excuse. Because the truth is: there is no more important time to be writing than right now, while the book is out there. If it sells, editors will want to know what else you've got. Your agent certainly will too, as their relationship with you hinges on your ability to produce more books, not just the one. And because the process takes so long to go from offer to actual publication, there is more than enough time to get seriously knee deep in the next thing so it will not be years between projects and you can strike while the iron is hot.

Even if you can't manage to get the words on the page, begin to research and map out the project. I like to buy a fresh spiral notebook that I dedicate to that project and start to take notes. I write down ideas, scenes, snippets of dialogue, great quotes I find that might suit the story and somehow find a way to be worked in later, ideas on theme - anything I can think of. It makes it so much easier when I sit down to write to have even the vaguest sense of who these characters are going to be and where I want this to go.

That said, I am a total pantser. Often when I start to write, I am working off of a zygote of an idea, and it's my characters that end up taking me the rest of the way there. Other people make charts, or use Save The Cat or Scrivener or Plot Whisperer tecniques. I use it all, but at different times and as needed. But first, I start with characters and setting. Who are these people? What attributes can I give them that make them unique and interesting and quirky so that they will stay with the reader long after they have finished the book? What can happen in their lives that will make a reader want to keep turning the pages to find out what happens next? What do they want and what is at stake if they don't get it? What (or whom) is standing in his/her way? Setting is important too, so where is the best place for this story to unfold? Is it someplace familiar to me or do I need to do research? And last but not least, are there other stories out there in the same vein as the one I would like to write? Or films? I begin to draw up lists and start to review them all to make sure I am not inadvertently duplicating something that already exists so I can make sure my take on things is fresh and fun.

The best part is finally diving in and meeting these new characters and finding out who they are and what they have to say. Immersing myself in their world helps me to forget the inevitable angst and anxiety of focusing on the last book and wondering when something will move with it in the ways that I am hoping it will. And when the other book does finally sell, getting back in the heads of those characters will be like meeting up with old friends.

This limbo time is precious. Don't waste it. DO take a break between projects, to clear your head, regroup, celebrate, and dust. (I can usually write my name in it by the end of a project: true story.) But then get busy.

Being On Submission (a.k.a. Thank you Costco for 2-Pack Bulk Nutella)

So REBEL WITHOUT A CLUE is out there in the inboxes of some of the most amazing editors in New York City, and I'm hoping the perfect editor falls in love with Hank and Peyton and all the other crazy characters. However, I'm here to tell you that when Tom Petty said "The waiting is the hardest part" he wasn't kidding. I'm not gonna lie: having a book on submission to editors and waiting to hear back is not for the faint of heart. It's a l-o-n-g process, filled with lots of nail biting, inbox refreshing, Nutella-straight-out-of-the-jar eating complemented by the occasional Happy Hour of Gilmore Girls on Netflix marathon for distraction. Because this part of the process can take aywhere from days to months, my friends, and there really isn't a whole lot you can do about it.

Oddly, I am much calmer about this part of the process than the agent search, despite the Nutella eating, because lets be real, I do that anyway. Somehow an agent search feels so much more personal. An agent is not only evaluating your work, but your future potential, your whole package, your body of work, both written and unwritten, and it's a very personal relationship, much like a marriage. At this stage of the game, things seem more black and white. An editor loves your story, or they don't. They feel it has issues that need fixing and they have a vision to get it there or they feel they are not the best fit for it. His/her publishing imprint is looking for books just like yours or they already have something similar. In short, things that you cannot control. At all. And there's something very freeing in finding that right representative to take the reins, trust in their expertise and knowledge of knowing where it might generate the most interest, and letting go. I believe I've found that kind of championing partner in my new agent, Leigh Feldman, and I have the absolute faith that if she can't find REBEL a home, no one can. Honestly, when she offered representation, I thought it had to be a mistake. :) I was so nervous, and in fact, I think my exact words to her were "I'm shaking," to which she replied, "Why, are you cold?" She's witty, and smart and all-around amazing, and I feel so lucky every day to be working with her.

In the end, it all comes down to faith and trust. Faith that you've written something good/funny/important/poignant, trust that you are partnered with someone who shares your excitement about your work and is as passionate about it finding its way into the world as you are, and the underlying belief that the delay is never the denial. That while there are plenty of "I sold my book in six days" stories, history has shown you that your story is different, and not to get rattled when results don't come immediately. Everything comes in its own time.

In the meantime, I'm busy at work researching everything from funeral homes and embalming procedures to Indian cooking and the Food Network and plotting my next novel. I'm sure if anyone saw my cache right now they would be hella confused, but I absolutely can't wait to write this next story :) It promises to be pretty hilarious. It's also a great distraction from agonizing over who may or may not have responded today and potentially put me one step closer to my life's dream coming true. And the reality is, once the book sells, while that's awesome and confetti-toss-worthy, I've got to be writing the next one and the next one after that, digging deep and finding all the crazy, funny stories rattling around inside my brain and helping them find their way onto paper. Or into a Word doc. Whatever.

In the meantime, writer friends, just FYI: Costco sells two-packs of giant sized Nutella bottles for about 8-1/2 dollars just rows from where they sell those super-comfy yoga pants. Coincidence? I think not.

Darkest Before The Dawn

Last we spoke, I was busy shaking up my personal snowglobe and making a few changes, but I didn't really get into what they were. But the truth is, what was really happening is I was digging deep. I had to sit with myself and figure out how badly I wanted this writing dream, how much I believed in myself and my work, and my ability to find the right connection with someone who could help me get the other half of the way there. So I made a really scary decision. I decided to leave my then agent and start from ground zero with my shiny new project, querying all over again. Leaving your agent when you are unpublished in search of a new one is absolutely terrifying, I'm not gonna lie. You've worked so hard just to get them in the first place, and then you choose to walk away? But it's a partnership, and sometimes, like in other types of partnerships, one person or the other needs change.

I started querying. At first 5-10, then another few, and eventually I just threw a whole bunch of them out there, because what exactly was I waiting for, really? Querying takes forever, sometimes months until you can hear back, and I already felt like I'd wasted a lot of precious time. Several writer friends offered up referrals to agents they knew, as well as their own. And within 72 hours of starting to query, I had amassed 11 full requests and 2 partials. It went like this, up and down, over the course of the next two and a half months. One would reject, and just as quickly, another would request. And suddenly names were showing up in my inbox that I couldn't believe were requesting my book.

But despite the constant amount of requests (by the end I'd had an amazing 26 full requests and 4 partials and then 3 more full requests when I pulled the query from people who wanted to know if they could still see it and throw their hat in the ring), a funny thing hapened. Self doubt started to creep in. Crazy, right? So much interest, so much activity, but yet also so much silence. It was deafening. Because if you work in publishing or if you are a writer, you know that this business moves at a snail's pace, and it is not at all uncommon to wait months until you hear back from agents or editors on a manuscript. And I'm not gonna lie: I'm an impatient girl. It's like I was sinking deeper and deeper into some sort of emotional quicksand, until it felt like it could envelop me whole, feeling like maybe despite all this interest, they will all come back no. My writer friends tried to boost me up, to reassure me this kind of attention was unusual and something had to happen, but I'd crossed a threshhold of sorts in that silence where I had started to lose faith. And the one piece that kept me going was a nugget from my friend Nadine, who said to me with each rejection, "If that train doesn't stop at your station, it was never your train."

And then, the morning after the worst day, the one where I just kept hitting refresh on my inbox to the point of carpal tunnel syndrome, it happened. I woke up and had an email from my top choice agent, Leigh Feldman, asking if I could talk at some point this week. Surely she must have mixed me up with someone else. I'd only sent her the full manuscript 5 days prior and now here she was, wanting to talk. Because agents don't usually call you unless they are actually interested. And frankly, until I talked to her on the phone and she mentioned the title of my book, I was not entirely unconvinced she'd mixed me up with someone else and written to me by mistake.

Once she offered, I had to send out Offer of Representation letters to the 16 remaining agents who had the full at that time and also the 3 with partials, plus all who had the query so they would not waste time reading it. As I said, a few more wrote back with interest, a partial was upgraded to a full, and thus began the most crazy insane week of my life. Fast forward to say that it concluded with three offers of representation from three equally unbelievable agents, any of whom would have been absolutely incredible to work with and were so passionate about the project. Ultimately, I chose Leigh. My admiration of Leigh goes way back to when I queried my first novel BAND GEEK. Plus, she was the first to offer, which does mean something in my book when someone reads and knows they love something. She's so sharp, and has such great enthusiasm and vision and to be honest, as I told her, she had me at hello.

I feel incredibly blessed, and despite how unbearably painful it was to feel at the time, I'm even thankful for the lowest moments. They serve as a constant reminder that everything can change overnight, and that there's truth to that old saying "It's darkest before the dawn."